Embrace Your Twin Flame Experience

EMBRACE YOUR TWIN FLAME EXPERIENCE

[pic: Mario Testino]

Within the Twin Flame community, there seems to be a major disconnect on what is a true Twin Flame vs. a soul mate. I have been living with this connection for four years; and within those four years, I have been on countless message boards, read hundreds of blogs related to Twin Flames, and had the pleasure of people writing me e-mails about their personal journeys. And the funny thing is I know nothing more than I did four years ago when I met my “twin.” None of what I read has really had any effect over my life. The Twin Flame/Soul Mate path was a significant experience for me, but it was something I had to go through to truly understand how these connections work.

I’m tired of reading about the stereotypical stages and the inner workings of a Twin Flame relationship. I don’t want to hear about the runner and the chaser and how the runner will always come back. I don’t want to see that people are waiting for their “twins” to return. The truth is we really don’t know what these connections are.

My definition of a Twin Flame is not necessarily somebody else’s. Did I experience a deep, transforming soul connection that I had carried with me for lifetimes? Yes, without a doubt. Do I think he’s half of my soul or that we share the same Higher Self? Absolutely not. I don’t believe and have never that Twin Flames are half souls, nor do I believe that they share the same Higher Self. But here’s the thing: YOU DON’T HAVE TO BELIEVE WHAT I BELIEVE. You are free to think any way you wish in regards to your personal connection.

I don’t think anybody is right or wrong, because nobody really knows. Yes, people channel information from Spirit and from collective entities, but those channeled messages may not be completely accurate, or the concepts may be misinterpreted. There’s no reason to argue with anybody over this, or try to prove to somebody that you’re right and they’re wrong.

I spent the past four years, constantly trying to push my views down people’s throats and make them see. In my head, I thought I was helping them navigate through their journeys, but I realize now that I was just throwing my opinions onto them, hoping they would stick. I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s best to experience your connection and make up your own mind on what it is and what it isn’t. Call him/her a Twin Flame, soul mate, soul connection, karmic twin, etc. It’s your connection and nobody else’s. You should have the freedom to label it any way you want without judgement or somebody telling you it’s wrong.

There are the people who will tell you that a Twin Flame relationship is easy, smooth, energetically balanced, and everything flows right from the start. There’s no push and pull, no running and chasing, and no separation. And those couples are very proud of the Twin Flame label, and they will defend it to the death. I have seen people in these relationships get so sick of trying to drill into people’s heads the definition of what they believe is a true Twin Flame that they eventually give up and deactivate their online accounts. Some of them (not all) use the Twin Flame label as a badge of accomplishment, or a reward for being spiritual. All they do is argue with separated twins and try to shower them with THEIR TRUTH, which is exhausting for both parties.

Then, there are the others who will explain that a Twin Flame relationship has stages, and many times there is a runner and chaser, and there may be a separation, but the runner will always decide to come back, and when that happens the twins live happily ever after. The two sides constantly fight about who’s in a REAL Twin Flame relationship, and who’s not.

Trust me, the separated ones are already experiencing some of the worst pain imaginable. They don’t need anybody, especially self-proclaimed Twin Flame couples who are together, to make them feel worse about their connections. They shouldn’t have to deal with anybody judging their connections and down-playing the significance of the people with whom they feel them. It’s just not fair to do to these people who are already suffering immensely. Judging their connections and telling them that they’re not Twin Flames is not the answer. It’s not helping them. It’s not educating them. It’s honestly only making the situation worse and exacerbating their emotional pain and fear.

Let’s look at one possibility: What if there are two types of Twin Flames? There are the ones who you mesh with and everything is balanced, and there are the others where the energy isn’t. Because of this, there is no vibrational match between the two people and they separate. Like attracts like. If the vibrations don’t match up, they’ll float out of each other’s lives. Each of those types carry that “Twin Flame” energy, so instead of being one or the other, it’s both. Nobody is right, and nobody is wrong, because the two types of Twin Flames are experiencing the same energy: One is balanced and the other is unbalanced. Balanced energy keeps them together. Unbalanced energy separates them.

We need to start seeking other viewpoints and looking outside the box, finding what personally works for us. It’s okay to read the same copied and pasted literature on a website that you’ve seen a hundred times before and say “I DON’T AGREE WITH THIS. This doesn’t resonate with MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE.” Lately, there is a lot of new information that people are writing about related to Twin Flames, and it’s stirring the pot and angering people, but at least it’s making us ponder and question the way these connections work and their true purpose.

My connection is not yours and vice versa. If I experienced something different than yours, who am I to say my connection is more significant or be able to label yours? IT’S YOUR CONNECTION. You’re the one living it, and the anonymous person on a message board preaching to you about their connection compared to yours isn’t. You should be the one who defines it. There’s this really condescending sensibility within the Twin Flame community that your connection is not real, but theirs is. I see it all the time, and it infuriates me.

If a connection deeply affects you, IT MATTERS. Nobody has the right to tell you it doesn’t. Nobody should tell you what he/she means to you, or how you should feel about them. You have the power. Do not allow another person to try to take it from you or make you feel beneath them.

Matt Kahn, a spiritual speaker, says “Judgement is the opposite of Love. You cannot love when you are in the state of judging.” In regards to all the people who write to me or have shared their stories online, I will only hold you and your truth in a state of Love. I refuse to judge. I just ask that you do the same for me.

If you are currently dealing with a twin flame connection and need help navigating it, book a Twin Flame Connection Reading or Energy Balancing Session with us here:  http://awakenedqueen.com/twin-flame-connection/

We are here to help you with whatever you are dealing with.  Find out if reconnection is possible or how you can move on. We can guide you in any situation, no matter how difficult and complex it may seem.

Soulmate Manifesting

 

Do you want to manifest a soulmate? I have three words for you: WRITE A LIST. It’s that simple! So what does this list entail exactly? Be clear and specific. The Universe takes your words literally, almost to a ridiculous degree. If you ask for a man who will love you, you may want to specify that he’s emotionally and physically available, otherwise you could end up with a man with a girlfriend, or somebody who loves you, but for whatever reason, is unable to be with you. Details, details, details, and lots of them! Make your dreams become a reality.

Visualize this person in your head and describe their characteristics. Who is this person? What do they look like? What kind of personality do they have? Most importantly, describe the relationship you wish to have with this person. Are you just looking for a casual dating situation? Do you want to live together? Do you want to get married? Do you want to have children?

What are you looking for? Envision it, then write it in a journal or a piece of paper. Close the journal or set the paper in a safe place and this is important: FORGET ABOUT IT. Let it go. This is the Law of Detachment. Let the Universe do its work. Don’t worry about when and where you’re going to meet them. Just enjoy your life. Trust that it will happen.

Ask yourself “What does the word soul mate mean to me?” Is your soul mate a compatible romantic partner, or is it a strong spiritual connection with somebody with whom you’ve shared past lives and have karma to balance? Sure, it can be both, but sometimes it’s not.  A true soul mate can be one of the most challenging relationships of your life. 

Lisa Frideborg Lloyd, a tarot reader and blogger, wrote a wonderful post listing the reasons why it’s best not to manifest a soul mate relationship. As somebody who has manifested soul mate relationships by writing lists in my journal, all I have to say is be careful what you wish for. Soul mate relationships can be transformative, but hell on earth. These connections are best for spiritual growth, but can be quite difficult if both partners have unhealed issues.

Instead of using labels while creating  your list, e.g., soul mate or Twin Flame, focus on the person you want to meet and the relationship you wish to have with them. The rest will fall into place. Soul mate relationships can be created with the right person. You don’t need to have had past lifetimes together. It’s not necessary. You want to manifest somebody with whom you are emotionally and physically compatible and share the same goals.

When you compile your list, write as it’s already happening. Everything should be in the present tense. E.g., “She has long, flowing blonde hair. She is loving. She is nurturing. She is emotionally ready for a long-term relationship. We are extremely happy together. We are married.” This is a powerful way to manifest.

Arielle Ford, the acclaimed soul mate expert, who wrote “The Soulmate Secret”, shares a story about the woman who manifested her soul mate through crayons:

“Her name is Gayle and many years ago she was advised by her astrologer to put her intentions for a soul mate into the world by coloring a mandala. She took a black and white mandala and a rainbow of multi-colored pencils and began declaring her intentions while she colored in a space on the mandala.  She asked for things like: finding the perfect spiritual friend and lover to go through life with; a man who is kind to animals; someone who would appreciate her sense of humor; a man who would be accepting and open to her spiritual quest. For each intention she used a different color until the entire mandala became a multi-hued Technicolor testimony to the qualities she desired in her future partner. Within weeks of doing this she met her soul mate and they have now been married for more than twenty years.”

Manifesting a love partner is simple, but being ready to love and accept love without fear can be difficult. You have to ask yourself before you write your list the following questions:

“Do I love myself?”

“Could I love myself more?”

“What could I do to show myself love?”

“Have I let go of my past hurts from relationships?”

“Have I forgiven my ex-partners for their mistakes?”

“Have I forgiven myself for mistakes in my relationships?”

“Am I ready to love and be loved?”

“Our barriers to love are rarely consciously chosen. They are our efforts to protect the places where the heart is bruised. Somewhere, sometime, we felt as though an open heart caused us pain or humiliation…we tried to build a fortress across our heart, to protect us from any cold assault.”

– “A Return to Love”, Marianne Williamson

If you fear love, you attract people who fear love. When you emanate love, all you do is attract love. And that is when your soul mate walks into your life.

 

What You Need to Know About the Twin Flame Connection

Twin Flames meet to heal and transform each other. That is their only purpose. The universe doesn’t care if you have a romantic relationship with each other. You are contracted to meet. What you do with that meeting is between you and your twin. Through free will, each is given the choice to heal or not. Some may choose to stay despite the rollercoaster of emotions and intense love and heal. Some may choose to run away and never come back and not heal.

In the case of my twin, he closed his eyes so he wouldn’t have to see. That was the message given to me by Spirit. I desperately wanted to heal his wounded soul, but he didn’t want that. Healing his emotional karma meant that he would have to do introspection and inner work, and he chose not to. His life consists of parties and friends; he engages in anything that will distract him from having to look at himself.

Once we separated, he built a wall between us, so he would be able to block me out forever. And it worked. After a few attempts over the past two years on my part to communicate with him, he ignored me. The rejection almost killed me.

Through his rejection of me, I was pushed into the depths of my soul to face my deepest, most painful issues. I was forced to look within and fix the broken pieces of myself. I spent what seemed like an eternity healing my emotional/karmic wounds. I thought the process would never end.

I grew increasingly more depressed and anxious, trying to repair all the damaged parts of myself, with the hopes that through my healing, my twin would heal himself and we would get back together. It never happened. And it will most likely never happen in this lifetime.

I have finally come to a point where I am completely content with that thought. He has chosen his path, and all I can do is to respect his choice. I have chosen my path as well. He wouldn’t be happy with the type of deep love that I wish to have with a man. And I wouldn’t be happy with the type of surface love that he seeks. He is too damaged to truly love somebody. I am healed and ready to love with every cell of my being. Our paths are different.

I see the type of woman he has chosen as a girlfriend, and it’s made me realize who he is. It was the one thing I had never been able to see in the situation. With Twin Flames, you fall in love with their souls first. I loved his soul, and because of that I assumed I knew the type of person he was. I was under the impression, he was authentic, but he was the furthest thing from that.

He tries to be everything he’s not, because he is too wounded to be his true self. Hurt people are frightened to show people who they truly are. He hides his emotions and wears “masks.” For a brief moment in time, he showed me his true self, but it was fleeting. And once he hid it again, I desperately tried to bring it back, but he wouldn’t allow it. That was the beginning of the end for us.

During our fight, I called him out on it. I told him he that he was full of shit, and he tried to pretend he didn’t have feelings for me when he did. I basically said he tried to be somebody he was not so he wouldn’t have to be himself. This is what Twin Flames do to each other: they stir up the shit. They try to make each other see what needs to be fixed. I was basically holding up a mirror to him, saying “You need to fix this about yourself.”

There were mistakes I made that night, and I have forgiven myself. Flying off the handle is never the way to deal with a situation. Pushing somebody to be their authentic selves, or even pushing them to heal themselves is never the solution.

The experience made me learn many lessons about myself, as well as dealing with other people. You can’t make somebody do something they don’t want to do. He did not want to heal. And he didn’t want to give me a chance to help him heal. His soul had made a choice. There was no changing that.

I am sick of reading post after post on Twin Flame relationships, where the twin is pining after the other for years and years, and there is no talk of anything new. Where are the stories about how the twins never came back together, but they found happiness with other people? Does it ever happen? Nobody knows, because nobody ever writes about new relationships. By what I’ve gathered from reading stories online, apparently, you meet your twin, and if it doesn’t work out, you’re screwed, doomed to be alone for the rest of your life. That’s far from the truth, but by the lack of information on the internet, that’s what would they would lead you to believe.

Blog after blog, article after article, it’s the same bullshit: Somebody met their twin; it was love at first sight. Everything was heaven on earth, but then something happened and they split apart. Now one of the twins is in complete agony from the separation and the other one is living life, having romantic relationships, totally unaffected. Sound familiar?

From what I’ve seen, and I’ve read everything there is on Twin Flames, the internet is inundated with only the romantic elements of the Twin Flame journey without any of the reality. Nobody ever mentions getting back together after a Twin Flame separation. And nobody discusses new relationships. So what, you just crawl into a ball after you separate from your twin and die alone?? All the stayers turn into Miss Havisham, waiting for a phone that will never ring, or the return of a twin that will never happen? Give me a fucking break.

Part of the reason why this connection is so difficult, is because there is so little comfort or information available. It seems as if every Twin Flame blog I go to, is just a bunch of copied and pasted crap from somewhere else. Nobody has anything new to say about it. It leads me to believe that the people who are writing about this specific connection have no clue what they’re talking about; or they have never experienced the phenomenon but are trying to to make money by writing about it or by advertising their “Twin Flame” readings.

Let me tell you one thing about “Twin Flame” readings, Spirit will only give you the information they want you to know at that time. In the midst of one of these connections, it’s best to look within for the answers, or connect with a Reiki or shamanic healer to guide you and heal your energetic blockages along the way.

During this particular journey: Tarot readings are not the answer. I love tarot cards, but these connections go too deep for you to be able to get a good reading. The energy between the twins fluctuates so much and so sporadically that your readings will never be entirely accurate. Trust me on this one. I tried reading for myself, as well as getting tarot readings by one of the best psychics in my city for two years, and there were many times, both of us got it wrong.

In my experience, my Reiki shamanic healer, Maura, was able to help me the most.

Maura has saved my life many times during this incredibly heart-wrenching process. She was the one who was able to clear out the last of the negative energy and pain that I had been holding on to since the end of 2011. She is available for distance healing if any of you are looking for a healer who can help them. I highly recommend an intuitive healing session with her. My life would never be the same without her. If you are unable to book an appointment with her, seek out a Reiki healer. It is one of the best decisions I ever made during my spiritual journey.

If you are going through a Twin Flame or soul mate connection and you have questions about the journey, please feel free to contact me through this blog. I will be happy to talk to you about your specific situation and give you some guidance. Love yourself and be kind to yourself.

The one line that I have said to myself to help me heal the past and let it go is:
“I did the best I could being the person I was at that time.”

Image via Last Light Art by Adam LoRusso

New Moon Peacock Spell to Find a Soulmate

Since the New Moon is approaching (January 30), I created a spell to manifest a romantic soulmate. This is a spell for somebody who is serious about meeting a life partner. If you have any baggage or emotional issues from a past relationship, I highly recommend not doing this particular spell. Cast this spell when the timing feels right. If you have issues, work on yourself first.

Manifesting a soulmate is no joke. Make sure you know what you’re asking for because meeting a soulmate will rock your world. You are asking the Universe to send you a soul connection. This is somebody with whom you have shared past lives.

It is one of the deepest connections you can have with a person, because you have met them many times before in previous lifetimes. You will trigger each other’s issues; you will help each other grow. However, personal growth is not all hearts and roses: In fact, growth can be quite painful at times. One has to understand how soulmate love has been romanticized, losing its true meaning over the years. This is a spiritual connection first, a romantic relationship second.

If you’re not ready to love, if you’re not ready to be loved, and if you don’t love yourself, meeting a soulmate can be hell on earth. This is a spell for people who are truly ready for a loving relationship.

What you will need:
2 red candles
1 pink candle
2 peacock feathers
1 chunk of raw rose quartz (the bigger, the better)
rose oil
lavender incense
sea salt

Before you cast the spell
The first step is washing your hands with sea salt and water. As you scrub the salt on to your hands, envision cleansing yourself of any pain from past relationships. You are wiping the slate clean for new love to enter your life. Rinse your hands.

Next, you will take a few drops of rose oil and anoint the candles. To anoint a candle, you will be starting from the center and working up. Once half the candle is anointed with oil, you finish coating the bottom half by starting in the center and working down. As you do this, think of you filling the candle with love. You can even say “I am filling this candle with the love of the Universe.”

Now, you will light the lavender incense to cleanse the space in which you will be casting your spell. Think of the smoke clearing away all the negative energy. It’s a way of “cleaning house” before your spell.

Write down your prayer of intention. These are words you are going to say out loud as you cast your spell. Be clear. I cannot stress this enough. There is a saying: “Be careful what you wish for.” You are basically wishing during a spell. Make sure you cover all the bases. Saying you want a relationship could mean many things. You may meet somebody and become friends with them only, because you didn’t specify what type of relationship you wanted. The Universe is funny that way. It takes your words literally.

Tell the Universe what you are seeking in a partner. Go into as much detail as you want about this soulmate. Word it in the “present” tense, as if you are already with this person. For example, instead of saying “I want a loving relationship”, say “I am in a loving relationship.” Tell the Universe what type of relationship you have with this soulmate. Visualize it in your head to help you.

Casting your spell
Take a few deep breaths. Center yourself. If you’re feeling stressed or anxious, meditate for a few minutes. Envision your ritual space in the middle of a circle. The circle is protected from all energy except who what type of energy you choose to invite in. Say out loud “Archangel Michael and all the Archangels, please keep my circle protected. May only the highest of Love, Light, and Wisdom enter my circle.” There are different ways to cast a circle. This is the method I use when casting mine.

You will now call in any deities into your circle. I personally believe in God, so I call in “God.” However, you may feel more comfortable calling in “gods or goddesses” or other “Ascended Masters.” Whomever you pray to, is who you will invite into your circle. I also invite in my Angels and Spirit Guides of Love and Light.

Position your candles. The first red candle represents you. The second red candle represents your soulmate. You are going to face these across from each other. Place the pink candle in the middle. The pink candle represents LOVE. This is the love that you two will have together in your relationship.

Now, take the chunk of rose quartz and place it next to the pink candle. The rose quartz will raise the power of the spell. Rose quartz attracts love. Next, you will place your two peacock feathers next to the candles. One feather represents you. The other represents your soulmate. Peacock feathers are used in magick, because the “eye” on the feather symbolizes the “third eye.” It’s also known as your brow or sixth chakra. The third eye sees everything. It sees what your normal eyes do not. Think of you and your soulmate opening your “eyes” to find each other.

Say your prayer of intention out loud. You may chant it once, or as many times as you see fit. It’s your personal preference. This is your spell. Make it whatever you want it to be. At the end of your prayer of intention, say “Please bring this soulmate to me as long as Free Will allows. So mote it be.” Then light the candles and burn them all the way down.

Once you light the candles, it will be time to close down your circle. Thank all the deities, Angels, and Spirit Guides whom you have invited into your circle. Then ask them to leave your circle, as the spell has been cast, and the circle must be closed.

Keep your candles lit until they burn down on their own. Be safe. If you need to leave the house or go to bed, snuff out the candles, do not blow them out. Fire safety is a priority. It will not affect the power of the spell if you have to snuff them out and re-light them later. As long as you burn down the candles, the spell will be effective.

Once the spell is cast, do not think about it. Let the Universe do its work. Enjoy your life. Have faith. Let life happen. Don’t try to hold on too tightly to how it happens. Trust that everything will work out for the highest good.

I cast mine this past weekend, and this is what it looked like. I added some tarot cards to the spell, but it’s not required. Do whatever comes naturally. If there is something you think you should add to the ritual, by all means, do it! The key to spellwork is adding elements that will help you envision your desire happening. It’s similar to a vision board in that regard.